Thursday, January 12, 2012

Happy Birthday Tyler

Two years ago on this day, I was in a lot of pain. It was expected, but I was not ready for how long it would take. I was so anxious to see you and so scared. Would I be a good mom? Would you be healthy?

When they held you up for me to see you I was thrilled. When I was finally wheeled into recovery I wanted to hold you so bad, but I was shaking and afraid I would toss you out of my arms or that I might scare you. I cried watching you in your daddy's arms. I ached to touch you. When finally, I stopped shaking I snuggled you tight and started inspecting you. Ten fingers, ten toes, a perfect little nose, and so much hair. 

When we brought you home I was in awe of you. I wanted to hold you and snuggle you every little minute of every day. We were exhausted but everything was worth it.

Every stage you have entered I have emphatically decided this is my favorite stage. I loved when you were tiny and needed me so much, I loved when you became so curious and would smile all the time, I loved when you started walking and found a little freedom, and I love that you are becoming more independent but still find you as my shadow.

How wonderful it has been to be your mother. There are days that I fall short, my patience runs thin, and I am so exhausted. You seem to sense this and always come to love on me or insist that I play with you. Being your mom is hard work, but it is easy to love this job. It is easy to look into those big blue eyes and forget all the stress, and just sit and play with you.

You remind me how fun life can be, all the wonderful things God has created. For me you are one of the most treasured gifts God could ever give me.

Happy Birthday Tyler! Congrats on turning 2 and all that you have accomplished so far.  I am very blessed to have you as a son and I hope you have many more.

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